Doipify your El Mop?! Is that a verbal spell component?

No, silly. Doip (DOIP: Dragon of Icespire Peak) ify your El Mop (LMOP: Lost Mine of Phandelver).

In other words, remove the linear story from Lost Mine of Phandalin, and make it more open-ended like Dragon of Icespire Peak.

I realize I could have just said that from the start. But then I wouldn’t have been able to shout “DOIPIFYYOURELMOP!” Which was really, really fun. My wife does not agree. I really should have warned her.

Anyhoo, having run this adventure many times, it is my opinion that Nezznar the Black Spider adds nothing of value to Lost Mine of Phandelver. In fact, his machinations oft-times become more of a hurdle for the Dungeon Master than a plot device for the adventure.

Everything about the Black Spider’s scheming goes out the window the moment you have a table that doesn’t care for unravelling a mystery or being led by the hand through a story arc. And if I’m being honest here, that story isn’t really all that interesting to begin with. At the end of the day, the Black Spider is basically just Hans Gruber: some rando dude commanding a bunch of mercenaries for the sole purpose of enriching himself.

Gundren Rockseeker and Sildar Hallwinter can still be ambushed and taken prisoner by goblins. That’s what goblins do. If the characters don’t initially go down the goblin trail to the Cragmaw Hideout, Nundro and Tharden Rockseeker could offer the characters a sizeable reward to find their brother instead. Then, upon rescuing their brother, the Rockseekers could simply ask the party to help them clear Wave Echo Cave of the monsters they encountered when they initially tried (and failed) to explore the place themselves.

Glasstaff and his Redbrands can still be terrorizing Phandalin without the need for Nezznar the Black Spider.

The party could still travel to Thundertree in search of Mirna’s precious family heirloom as reward for freeing her family from Redbrand captivity. Although I think it would be more interesting to make it a scenario where Mirna was escorted to Thundertree under guard to retrieve the necklace as a ransom to free her family, only to have her become a prisoner/treasure of Venomfang, and the guard become spider food in the town’s ruined store.

Harbin Wester would still need someone to take care of the orcs at Wyvern Tor.

Daran Edermath could still want someone to see what’s going on at Old Owl Well.

Sister Garaele could still ask the characters to put on their manager smocks and go deal with the shrieking Karen out in Conyberry.

Like, you don’t need Nezznar the Black Spider for any of this. And so, without this villain, Dungeon Masters are less likely to run into complications that arrive when players drive the story off the rails, which is like…a super power for players.

So, if you’re concerned your group will not engage with the story of Lost Mine of Phandelver, or if you think it would be a lot simpler and more fun to run this adventure as a sandbox instead, take a deep breath, fill your lungs with as much air as you can, and shout it with me:

DOIPIFYYOURLMOP!

I’ve been having fun sharing my random D&D thoughts over at Bluesky. If you’re interested in following, I’m at @ticklecorn.bsky.social. I’ll follow back.

If you’d like to support my work, please consider checking out my supplements for Lost Mine of Phandelver and Dragon of Icespire Peak over on Dungeon Master’s Guild! All of my titles are Free/PWYW offerings.